1. Embrace My Procrastination
I will continue to leave everything until the last possible moment, because why be efficient when I can stress myself out?
2. Master the Art of Excuses
I will become an expert in coming up with creative excuses for why I can't do something, because taking responsibility is overrated.
3. Lose My Patience Faster
I will work on losing my patience at the speed of light, because why be calm and collected when I can become a raging ball of frustration?
4. Embrace My Inner Couch Potato
I will fully embrace my sedentary lifestyle and spend even more time binge-watching shows, because who needs exercise and fresh air?
5. Take Selfies Everywhere, All the Time
I will make sure to capture every mundane moment of my life and flood everyone's social media feeds with endless selfies, because nothing says "I need attention" like excessive self-obsession.